L I V E && L O V E

Good day to smile.

Sunday, May 13, 2012 / 12:43 AM

Hurros everybody!

This weekend has put me in a rather good mood. Which also means poor productivity... I'll say this once and say it again, self-loathing is the best mood for productivity. I didn't study/do hw at all this weekend. Which I will probably regret as I have AP tests still this coming week, and finals... and have projects due. Yes, you know it. (: that means no 4.71 for this semester.... Boooo.

On the bright side though. I got to watch half an episode of Running Man (first time in a long time, or maybe it just felt like a long time cause last week literally felt like one really long day of school hell). Yesterday felt like a really long day of happy... to make up for it. Not necessarily happy even per say, just relief and a breath of air. Whew. Today I went shopping with my sis and bought $250 bucks worth of stuff. Like I said, THERAPEUTIC SHOPPING. The best.

I started off today feeling terribly lonely and terribly depressed that everyone was freaking depressed all the time.... But then felt better as the day went on. It was chill and I realized I don't have to worry about everyone else's depressed lives all the time.

Yup. I'm getting progressively more un-nice. Yeah. Well. Fuck it. Cause I'm gonna be happy if I feel like it. Not gonna let anyone stop me.

- Rei

Labels: Daydreams

IRIS: Candy Kiss.

Friday, May 11, 2012 / 11:16 PM

Omg. To think real people like this exist. Lee Byung Hun did this before he was in dramas... and for real life too... That man is just a piece of art in every single way. Agh. I want a kdrama or a fairytale too. Haha.

- Rei

Labels: Daydreams, My Escape

Everything :).

Wednesday, May 9, 2012 / 9:45 PM

It's times like this I'm so happy I don't tumblr. LOL. Cause everyone secretly stalks each other's tumblrs... where as my blogger I approximately know who does and doesn't read it. (or knows that it exists).

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- Rei

Labels: Daydreams, my Heartbeat

No more my grades are giving me heart attack posts.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012 / 11:26 PM

On the other hand...

I'm still traumatized by "Rei's love life is all over the place". ... What does that even mean. LOL. I feel really sad. I'm not gonna lie. But then again, it makes sense. Cause I can talk to every single freaking person, play the game, be funny, be interesting. ETC. ETC. But not you. Oh no, not you. Yups. Pathetic.

And the fact that you become such a big part of my everyday thoughts... AGAIN. PATHETIC.

Ahem. Well then. I've recently changed favorite person to text again! Cause freaking Sunny never texts me anymore. Can't ask him for love advice... LOL. WHY YOU SO BUSY ALL THE TIME.

Anyhow... Again, this isn't really a real blogpost. I promise to blog some more after these next two weeks are over. I can barely think. (Oh I promised not to talk about grades but... I'M MISSING TWO ASSIGNMENTS IN AP BIO. WHAT THE... BALLS.)

- Rei

Labels: Daydreams, my Heartbeat

AHHHHH. BALLSACS.

Saturday, May 5, 2012 / 9:27 PM

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. WHY IS LIFE SO DIFFICULT. I HAVE MORE THINGS TO DO THAN TO GO DOWN TO UofI FOR 10 HOURS NEXT WEEK. FJODSJIFOSDOF. I HAVE ALL MY FINALS DUE THE FOLLOWING WEEK. I HAVE NO FUCKING TIME!!!!!!!! AGHHHHHHHH.

So stressed. I wanna cry. ): I just wanna eat and watch Running Man. I'd rather go running everyday than have to worry about school anymore......... So stressed. JFOIDJSFOS. Stress -> Eating food -> Fat -> Sad/Angry/Self-loathing -> Stress... IT'S THE VICIOUS CYCLE. JFOIDSOFSD. /rant.

Okay. I'm done.

- Rei

PS: No one stress me out this week. I'll probably get my period by the middle of this week even though it's not time yet... It's cause I'm gonna be too stressed. And I'm betting on a mental/emotional breakdown this week... YUPS. :) Everyone be nice to me.

Labels: Daydreams

Inevitable stress is kicking in.

Friday, May 4, 2012 / 11:12 PM

My mind is in a mode of like absolute panic right now. I'm 5% away from a 4.71 GPA right now. JUST. 5%. Half of it is my pride speaking, wanting to be able to tell off the people who said "Wow, how did you get a B in Bio?" Okay, I'm a dumbfuck okay? Is that the reason you want to hear? Man... I hate smart people who think they're all that. Cause half the time they are all that, athletic, smart and musical. Oh and pretty and skinny. Fantastic, nothing that I can say about you being any worse than me, the only thing I can do is show you through my own abilities. Too bad I'm a dumbfuck and I need to work infinitely hard to just be mediocre. Yeah, all my grades are borderline right now. Ranging from a 87.54 to a 91.18... (minus gym, cause that shit doesn't count... I have a 96% even though I ditched so many days). And I'm soooooooooooooo screwed. Projects in every class, fighting for that couple of points left in each class... Shit.

Plus, AP Tests. As a matter of a fact, I don't even know why I'm taking AP Bio and AP Environ Sci test... Cause frankly they won't matter in my major. But since the money has been spent, I need to fucking do well. Shit. Not to mention finals are all earlier, if I had just one more weekend, the 19th, everything would be fine, but I don't got that. I got this week and next week... Oh wait, I don't got no next week cause my whole day from freaking 9 am to 5 pm is "booked" for some stupid retarded graduation where I don't even know anyone. Damn. Fuck. Bitch. Shit.

Ugh. I hate not having control of my life. As in... I think I have 2 weeks, but I actually have 1... And every single time I was gonna do something important this week... like run, you had something for me to do. I'm so annoyed. Shit.

AGHHH. I'M SO FUCKING SCREWED. JFODISJFO. NO TIME TO DO APES FINAL. NO TIME TO DO CHINESE FINAL. NO TIME TO FINISH BIOTECH BOOK FOR FINAL. NO TIME TO FINISH CATCHER IN THE RYE FOR MY FINAL PAPER. FJOSIJFOSDOFJDSOFJIDSJFOJFODSIJFOSDJFOIDJSFODJSFOSJFODIFJOSFIJODFJOSDIJFODJFISDOFJSIOFDIJSOJFDIFOSJDOF. JFOSIGOS AGH. SO FUCKED. SO FUCKED. NO TIME TO FINISH APES BOOK OR AP BIO BOOK BY THE END OF THIS WEEKEND. FJOSDIFJOS AGHHH. NO TIME TO DO ADDITIONAL STUDYING WITH AP BOOKS THAT I'M TOO POOR TO BUY... AGH. FJSODIJFOSD. NO TIME TO DO BIOTECH PROJECT THAT IS DUE THIS TUESDAY AND I HAVE A RETARDED PARTNER THAT DOESN'T DO SHIT FOR. JFOSIDJF. AGHHH. SO STRESSED. CAN'T. HANDLE.

Ugh. And my stomach's been hurting like crazy. All that fucking yogurt is gonna make me die. Not even kidding. Ugh. I just wanna go running with my buds. I don't wanna do school or family shit anymore. AGH.

- Rei

EDIT: Oh, and remembered. NO FUCKING TIME TO DO MY FREAKING MATH FERP. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUH. SCREWED FOR LIFE.

Labels: Daydreams, Woken up to Reality